I'm a Celebrity--Get Me a Publisher!

At some point, the Oscars will have to create a category honoring the worst books "written" by a star of the silver screen.

Before we come to that dreadful day, however, we can enjoy the splendors of Celebrity Autobiography, an ongoing theatrical series dedicated to poking fun at some of the most agonizing literary twaddle known to man. Last night's installment, which Trudi and I attended at a venue on Manhattan's Upper East Side, featured a cast that included Carol Kane, Dick Cavett, Judy Gold, Alan Zweibel and host/co-creator Eugene Pack, with selections read (in character) from the autobiographies of luminaries such as Hedy Lamarr, Burt Reynolds and Mötley Crüe's Tommy Lee.

Taste may be subjective, but I think it's safe to say that Lamarr's musings on what it means to be a "star" were among the most ludicrous I've ever heard.

Fortunately, the talented cast read these selections with aplomb--especially Kane, whose languid Lamarr basically stole the show. It was quite an evening, and I have to say that I'm now even more reluctant to pick up a celebrity autobiography than before...which is, I suspect, a positive.

Now I wonder when we'll have a production skewering celebrities' attempts at classical music. Or...do we really need that?